I've been struggling in my life - my health, my children and a very good friend that put a halt to our friendship out of the blue. I have been struggling on how to word this post without any more hurt to others.
My health is topsy-turvy. I bounce from sleeping all the time to being awake too much until I hit a brick wall. Most is due to med changes as I had previously written. Still agitated and frustrated. Praying for peace - but for now I can't find it. Maybe God has given me a direction and I just haven't found it yet - looking for it in all the wrong places. I want a safe place, a haven - a soft bed, with great sheets, a great down comforter and completely in the dark. Climb in, curl up and get up when I can face the light again.
We went to our last family counseling last Friday. We were talking about chore charts. One note to remember is I have 11 year-old triplets - two boys, one girl. Both boys sunk to the floor and stayed under the table for the better part of the session. Their reasoning as to why they should not have to do any chores is that I have a house-cleaner who comes in once a week and does surface cleaning - vacuum, mop, clean the bathrooms. Her job is not put their toys away, hang up clean clothes etc. My daughter is tough - I mean really tough to deal with right now. Love her more than life itself - but some peace I might find there too would be extremely helpful. Chore chart back in effect tonight. Wish me luck on follow through. For the children and I, this is causing a great deal of tension and frustrations.
It is strange how friendship is. Sometimes it is a friendship where you see the friend frequently. Sometimes it is one where you go for a long while but when you do get to see that person it is like you pick up right where you left off. Sometimes it is where the friendship slowly falls away. Sometimes it is a friendship that comes to a screeching stop with a reason but not the complete truth.
Sometimes it hurts and sometimes it fades without any further ado. My true friends know my heart and describe me as caring, trustworthy and loving. I am lucky to have such a great, but small circle of friends that stand by me no matter what.
However a friendship ends - it is over, done and gone with the wind. But the memory of an important friendship remains.
More later -